100 Women: I want to break the stigma of painful sex

This article originally appeared on BBC’s World Service. Written by Phoebe Keane.

One woman’s story of a decade of wrongly diagnosed sexual pain has inspired a play – and with it, the hope that other women with sexual dysfunction can be helped.

It was on a cold winter’s day just over a year ago that actress Emily Francis heard an item on the radio that moved her to tears.

“I felt desperately sad listening to Callista’s story. This problem with her vagina had destroyed her life. She’d lost her relationship, become depressed… it felt tragic,” she says.

Callista, a fashion stylist in San Francisco, had been speaking to BBC 100 Women about her long journey to finding a cure for unbearably painful sex. Continue reading “100 Women: I want to break the stigma of painful sex”

My BBC Worldwide radio debut

 

When I was 16 I tried having sex for the first time, and I was surprised by how excruciatingly painful it was.  I knew it would hurt at first, that’s what everyone said anyways, but I never imagined it would feel like serrated knives between my legs, like fresh rope burn, like a ring of fire that burned for days afterwards.  It was so painful it traumatized me – I wouldn’t speak to my boyfriend after that, we broke up, and I fell into a deep depression which I couldn’t truly share with anyone.  Years passed before I would allow anyone to touch me, so scared was I of the consequences.  At the same time, I yearned to be like everyone else and I pretended none of this was that big of a deal.  I told myself I would get over it, that I just hadn’t met the right person, that I should wait until I was older to be having sex anyways.  I was very depressed, the psychological toll of chronic pain was devastating.  Because of the taboo around talking about sex, or having anything wrong with my “private area”, it would be years before I sought and received proper treatment.
Continue reading “My BBC Worldwide radio debut”